Funny Short Jokes | One Liner Funny Jokes
Funny Short Jokes: In some situation, it’s much risk to start the interaction and make a joke about the person. Funny Short Joke is nothing but the funny story that you tell to people to make them sit and laugh at it. Some people won’t laugh at silly jokes and risky to make them laugh but some will laugh at those. So, here are the Funny Short Jokes to make everyone happy.
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Funny Short Jokes
They say every piece of chocolate you eat shortens your life by 2 minutes. I did the math. Seems I died in 1543.
Groom: People ask me why I left a bachelor to be with this girl. Well, look at her. She’s wealthy and dying..
Wife says to her programmer husband, “Go to the store and buy a loaf of bread. If they have eggs, buy a dozen.”
Husband returns with 12 loaves of bread.
I was wondering, why does a frisbee appear larger the closer it gets… then it hit me.
I bought one of those tapes to teach you Spanish in your sleep. During the night, the tape skipped. Now I can only stutter in Spanish.
Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.
I gave up my seat to a blind person in the bus. That is how I lost my job as a bus driver.
Mother to Johnny: “how was your exam, is all questions difficult?”
Johnny: “No mom, all the questions were simple, It was the answers which gave me all the trouble”!
A farmer in the field with his cows counted 196 of them, but when he rounded them up he had 200.
Interviewee: Tell me, why did you leave your previous job?”
Interviewer: The company relocated and they did not inform me where!
I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather did, not screaming in terror like the passengers in his car.
I had a job selling security alarms door to door and I was really good at it. If no one was home I would just leave a brochure on the kitchen table.
I used to be into sadism, necrophilia, and bestiality, but I realized I was just beating a dead horse.
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Funny Jokes Most Hilarious
If you wet your feet your throat will reject. If you ‘wet’ your throat your feet will reject.
Teacher: Name some countries?
Australian Kid: Australia..
Teacher: That is it?
Teacher: Aren’t Africa, UK, US, India, Singapore, Europe countries?
Kid: Nope, They are not country, they are Foreign countries..
Q: What do you call a woman who will gives head for a pair of Jimmy Choos?
A: Head Over Heels
My ESL students try so hard and are so appreciative. One student paid me the ultimate compliment when she said, “You teach English good.” Another assured me, “I will always forget you.” And a third insisted, “I thank you from the heart of my bottom.”
A Buddhist walks up to a hotdog stand and says, “Make me one with everything.”
Just went to an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.
A pirate walks into a bar with a paper towel in his hat. The bartender says “Hey pirate, what’s with the paper towel?” The pirate replied “Arr, I got a bounty on me head!”
I’m starting a club to capitalize on Hipsters. its 10 dollars not to join.
My wife complained the other day that our kitchen clock almost killed her mother.
It fell seconds after where she had been sitting. That darned clock always was slow.
If women ruled the world there would be no wars.
Wars require strategy and logic.
I just saw two elementary school kids having a fist fight.
So as an adult I had to step in. They didn’t stand a chance.
I didn’t sleep very good last night.
So this morning I put Monster energy drinks in my coffee… I was half way to work when I realized I forgot my car.
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