Tell me a joke dear

Tell me a joke dear will take you through a hilarious collection of funny jokes in which you would appreciate the sense of humor in these jokes. It will make you laugh like anything. There are one-liners in which you could even find the smartness of this stuff. Get ready to burst out laughing with Tell me a joke dear. You are going to find it interesting.

The best ideas come as jokes. Make your thinking as funny as possible.

-David Ogilvy

Tell me a joke dear

Can you tell me a joke dear?

Little Johnny’s new baby brother is screaming up a storm. He asks his mom, “Where’d we get him?” His mother replies, “He came from Heaven, Johnny.” Johnny says, “Wow! I can see why they threw him out!”

The bride, upon her engagement, goes to her mother and says, “I’ve found a man just like Father!” Her mother replies, “So what do you want from me, sympathy?”

Q: Why did the ink pots cry?
A: Their mother was in the pen doing a long sentence.

A science teacher tells his class, “Oxygen is a must for breathing and life. It was discovered in 1773.” A blonde student responds, “Thank God I was born after 1773! Otherwise I would have died without it.”

An old teacher asked her student, “If I say, ‘I am beautiful,’ which tense is that?” The student replied, “It is obviously past.”

One day Jimmy got home early from school and his mom asked, “Why are you home so early?” He answered, “Because I was the only one that answered a question in my class.” She said, “Wow, my son is a genius. What was the question?” Jimmy replied, “The question was ‘Who threw the trash can at the principal’s head?'”

A young boy comes home from school in a bad mood. His father asks him, “What’s wrong, son?” The kid tells his dad that he’s upset because another kid has been teasing him and calling him gay. The father says, “Punch him in the face next time he does that. I bet he’ll stop.” The kid replies, “Yeah, but he’s so cute!”

It is awesome to tell me a joke dear

Teacher: “I asked you to draw a cow and grass, but I only see a cow. Where is grass?”
Student: “The cow ate the grass, sir.”

Q: What do an old person, a Mexican man, and a high school student close to graduation have in common?
A: They’re all seniors.

Teacher: “Name a bird with wings but can’t fly.”
Student: “A dead bird, sir.”

Teacher: “Jill, where is the America on the map?”
Jill: “Right there, ma’am.”
Teacher: “Correct. Now, Jack, tell me who found America.”
Jack: “Jill.”

An English teacher told his students that when pronouncing a word beginning with the letter “H” they should ignore the “H” as in hour, honor, and honest. That day when leaving for class, he left a note for his assistant, “Please heat my rice for me.” When the teacher returned to his office, he met an empty bowl. He asked the assistant, “Where is my food?” The assistant replied, “You said I should heat the rice for you, but you also instructed us to ignore the ‘H.'”

It was the first day of school. Harry’s mother went into his bedroom and said, “Come on Harry, get up now. You have to go to school today.”
“But I don’t want to go to school,” replied Harry, “I want to stay in bed. Why do I have to go to school”?
“Because,” answered his mother, “you’re a teacher!”

Teacher: “Why are you so late?”
Student: “Someone told me to go to hell.”
Teacher: “Why did that make you late to class?”
Student: “I couldn’t find it at first, but now here I am.”

Tell me a joke

Click here for Non-Veg Jokes in Hindi

It is happy to tell me a joke dear

The teacher of the earth science class was lecturing on map reading. After explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees, and minutes, the teacher asked, “Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, four minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude?” After a confused silence, a voice volunteered, “I guess you’d be eating alone.”

A teacher asks a student, “Are you ignorant or just apathetic?” The kid answers, “I don’t know and I don’t care.”

On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student, “What are your parents’ names?” The student replied, “My father’s name is Laughing and my mother’s name is Smiling.” The teacher said, “Are you kidding?” The student said, “No, Kidding is my brother. I am Joking.”

Chintu: “You never study, so how come you don’t fail your math tests?”
Pintu: “Because whenever there is a math test, I don’t go to school!”

Love to tell me a joke dear

Q: Why did the girl wear glasses in math class?
A: It improves di-vision.

Q: What’s the difference between a black and an Asian?
A: 10 minutes in the oven.

Hitler and his associates are having a discussion. He says, “Kill 6 million Jews and a cat.” One of his associates replies, “Mein Fuhrer, why must we kill a cat?” Hitler then exclaims, “See, no one cares about the Jews.”

Do not be racist; be like Mario. He’s an Italian plumber, who was made by the Japanese, speaks English, looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew!

Q: Why couldn’t the blonde add 10 + 5 on a calculator?
A: She couldn’t find the “10” button.

Q: What did the spider do on the computer?
A: Made a website!

Q: What did the computer do at lunchtime?
A: Had a byte!

Eventually, I decided to make my password “incorrect” because if I type it in wrong, my computer will remind me, “Your password is incorrect.”

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